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(Or, How not to Piss off Email Recipients)

Email is probably one of the most popular uses for computers. With hundreds of millions of computers connecting to the internet and millions of businesses providing access for their workers and staff, the growth in numbers of emails has been huge.

Probably the most annoying aspect of email is SPAM. It’s unasked for, it seems to be everywhere and mostly it’s gross-out stuff. What girl wants to be asked if she wants a longer penis? What guy wants to be told how his little guy or his performance is failing his woman?

But it’s easy to miss the other major email problem. You can see it at its most extreme in flame wars and email backlash but it’s there on a less obvious daily basis as well. Email is… well… writing. Words on a screen. Emoticons or smileys were invented in the recognition that there is a whole realm of content, present in face to face or some of it even in phone conversation, which gets omitted from emails. The expression on a face, the body language, or the tone of voice all provide communication clues that are incorporated into our understanding of what is being said.

Some other things that cause problems and unwarranted emotion because of emails…

No subject line – Most people have their email set up to list Date Received, Sender and Subject. For me, no subject line means delete – maybe if I know the sender I will hesitate, but even then it’s usually some Trojan or Worm has got into their email list and is spamming me or worse.

Sending ‘Bad Luck’ Emails – A pet hate. Has anyone, ever, actually had their life destroyed because they didn’t send one of these on to ‘at least five friends’? These emails are a waste of space and time. Don’t send them to me. They will not actually give you wonderful things and they will make me think less of your reasoning capacity.

Failing to Address Issues Raised – If I send an email asking questions, it is because I’d like some answers. Sending back a response that doesn’t even attempt to address my questions means either I stop emailing you, or I have to send it again.

Answering just the first question is almost as bad. Is there something wrong with people’s attention span that once they read a question they presume that’s the end of the email? I mean, really! There’s another paragraph there – in written language that means it’s there for a reason – please read it and respond, even if it is slightly different to the first paragraph!

Multi-megabyte Pictures – Microsoft Office allows you to reduce the size of pictures very easily – a couple of clicks and it’s done. There are zip programs that do the same. Not everyone has high speed internet, nor unlimited bandwidth, nor an ISP who lets them have 50MB of pictures in an email.

Think Before You Send – When you’ve typed up your email, review it. Many problems come from things said incorrectly or sent to the wrong recipient. Proof your work and better, try to see it from the recipient’s point of view. You will avoid a lot of trouble over misunderstandings or sending the CEO those nude shots of your boyfriend. (Or worse, HER boyfriend…)

Direct Flashback Where it Belongs – Don’t shoot the messenger. Someone sends you an email that is reporting what someone else did or said and it gets your emotions going. When you Reply, make sure you make it clear that you’re upset with the original perpetrator, not the person who passed along the information – you’ll keep more friends.

Make the world a better place and think about your emails before you send them, okay?